Heart Connection Toolkit

Become more intriguing and attractive to a man with almost no effort.

Reconnect Your Relationship

Bring him closer again and start your relationship a new in a way.

Commitment Blueprint Program

Rori Raye's 7 step program that will give you the power of getting him to commit to you.

Dating Secrets for the Single Mom

It's time to start living your dreams and thriving as a whole, fulfilled women again.

The Modern Siren Program

Why do some women have it so easy with men and you don’t? What is the key to enduring happiness? The Modern Siren will show you what you're missing.

Love Scripts For Relationships

How to turn feelings into words that any man cannot resist with Love Scripts and learn to say the things you need to say with confidence.

A Simple Change That Will Wow Him

One woman pictured twice looking east and west
You’d be amazed how much information a man will tell you in those early conversations if you simply give him the space to do so. You’ll learn important things about him that can help you decide whether this man is a good fit for you, not the other way around.

When you’re on a date, it’s natural to want to show him what a great catch you are. You might feel the need to pepper the conversation with witty remarks, or tell him about all the amazing things you’ve accomplished, or jump in and fill the silence when there’s a lull in the conversation.

But doing this can actually keep a man from wanting to see you again…and keep you from seeing whether he’s a good partner for you to begin with. That’s because when you’re doing the above behaviors, you’re actually working too hard to get him to like you. He’ll sense it, and it will keep him from being the one trying to win YOU over. Men value what they need to work for, so don’t rob him of the opportunity.

Instead, try this simple change of focus the next time you’re with a man.

Let’s forget a moment about dating and think about the people you like to spend time with. How do they make you feel? Chances are, you like to spend time with people who…make you feel good about yourself!

Your only job on a date is to relax, enjoy the experience, and make the other person you’re with feel comfortable. How do you do this? By letting him see you are simply happy to be in his company and by showing interest in him as a person. People love to talk about themselves. So ask him about what drives him, let him tell you all about that business deal he just pulled off, be curious when he talks about his hobbies.

The more he shares information about himself, and the more you listen, the more he will feel safe and comfortable in your presence. And he’ll take that good feeling with him long after you part…leaving him thinking about you and wanting more.


When you lean back and take your foot off the accelerator, you open up an opportunity to see what this man does. Where does he take the conversation? What does he talk about?

You’d be amazed how much information a man will tell you in those early conversations if you simply give him the space to do so. You’ll learn important things about him that can help you decide whether this man is a good fit for you, not the other way around.

You’ll also learn how sensitive he is to your feelings. Does he continue to go on about himself, or is he curious about you? The only way to find out about this is to resist the impulse to lead and control the conversation.

I’m not telling you that you shouldn’t reveal all those parts about yourself that make you an amazing woman. If he’s a good man – and especially if he’s the right man – then all these things will come out soon enough. But you don’t need to spill them so soon. A little mystery goes a long way. You are taking the time to learn about him, and he in turn grows more interested – an invested – in you.

If you’re at all doubtful about this approach, try it as an experiment. You’re (hopefully) going on a lot of dates on eHarmony. So, on the next one, shift your focus from you to him. Instead of thinking about how you are coming across, simply lean back, enjoy yourself, and focus on making the date comfortable for him. Very soon, you’ll find yourself sitting in front of a man who is focused completely on…you.

Thanks for reading this first step to better relationships. It’s now up to you to take the next step and see what The Modern Siren has for you.

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